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1.
As the passing of time decided to throw Up a hand in poor gesture of hello I returned with a nod and a smile And he took me back to when I was a child Needing a good spot to hide my tooth Was I really this afraid of losing my youth? Well, I don't know if I can think back But, I'm sure somewhere, I lost track Of just how much my wooden spine can pack Before it starts to splinter and crack Sending signals up to my brain And yeah, I may have felt some pain But, who has the room to complain now? When the sun can still shine as it rains Maybe all these tiny pleasures Are all that's holding me together.
2.
Staring into the sun Until the colors become One with themselves As my vision swells Now all I can see Is the absence of me These hands and thoughts Are nothing but spots Darting side to side Like they once tried To settle down Now just float around Like the molecule I am A spec without a plan A wreck of a man But I'm doing the best I can With so much shit to write In such a short time But... Nothing ever feels right Within the walls of my mind I let this mess fall out Learn a little more about What has held me here? For nearly all my years? My own foolish ways? Or former friendly frays? Of who I thought I was When I believed in love Oh, how long ago that's been Long enough not to love again.
3.
So let me begin With something to grin To(two) chords Oh no, wait, there's three An awkward melody Oh no, there's more? Yeah, four Is that enough? Do you like me? (doesn't matter) I do it for me Yes, I do it for me I do it for me It gets me by when I Am with friends or alone Singing this in my home Or the street or the woods We'd do it more if we could But for now it's just me But soon enough there will be Someone else playing C Sharply shaping this sound Scraping the ground I hope we crawl together Learning the ropes Of how we can cope With the reality That there is no forever So for now I sing So for now I feel better. (shape a sound, scrape the ground)
4.
Killed some time with a cure sticky sweet Like a cat sleeping in the street Without a care to compete Just a new friend for death to greet And if he gives me his hand I'll say "Carry me like a man" So I'll show My stained, crooked teeth While I've still got Feeling in my cheeks And some words to hum Hold or to speak Turned it up, got turned down So I fuck, fuck, fucked around Until I blindly fumbled and I found A far more heroic way to drown Into Atlantis where a king wipes his chin He smiles at me and says "You've got nothing to defend" So I'll show My stained, crooked teeth While I've still got Feeling in my cheeks And some strings to strum Thumb or become.
5.
When the rays through the trees Threw themselves at me I felt reborn, yet dismissed For the devils I kissed So sincere above the brow They just possess me now Always forcing me to play And before bed they say "Be it, your dismay Young man, you are mine But, wait In due time Some distant day You will find The rhyme To keep us at bay" And with such encouraging words... With such encouraging words I sang exactly what I heard And watched their humongous heads Float against the shore Where they will discretely instead Be plotting a new war And it wasn't until then That I could truly comprehend There is always a war Waiting to begin.
6.
All the people Blissfully kissing But I keep cool And keep listening For a swift miss Wishfully whistling By a fountain I caught her sitting She's well rounded But, oh, so skinny Reading a book Our eyes had not met Before she took Out a cigarette Can I be your light, little lady? Do you mind if I call you baby? Be what you may But don't say Maybe (don't say maybe) Just take my hand Sing a song with me One and two and Three, four, it's easy (1, 2, 3, 4) Together we can create A life so good, it's great Pack your bags, don't hesitate Don't make we wait Think of all the memories we can make With time as short as the breaths we take Dream girl, never make me wake (never make me wake) Sleep on, young man Yes, I will take your hand Come with me and I'll show you doors Where love liquidates and pours Over us as if it were rain You and I are truly one in the same Let me take you somewhere new You didn't know you already knew If you wake, where do I fly to? If you were to die, I die too Hell, who am I? Without you.
7.
Shelter me father, I can't build these words To save my soul, let alone cast a curse I've become a joke with no reaction And I need you to say "Sometimes shit happens" Now don't be a fool, boy, and don't imagine Your dreams like you will always have them Or they will have you locked up like an addict Begging for light, no, know you can't have it We all once got mixed up with the magic And we're still basking in the habit Comfort me mother, my head is on fire From falling asleep wherever I feel tired Waking up with a new observation The brain finally left the station Now don't feel so lost, son, just put on your cross Your bones are here to stay but the rest of you rots We all once got messed up with our thoughts Now all we can do is pray it stops To the only two who Know me, need me The two who used to Show me, feed me I love you.
8.
Every right now and then I watch my sorrows win And on them cloud covered days I'm busy filling up ashtrays Half choking on a lung From all these songs I've sung Thinking how your blood it Still somewhere stains a bucket In a tangled, tough corner Someone should somehow warn her Not a single drop deserves To be outside that heart No, not hers She had such kind eyes Anyone could love her And I'm sure that many have Far too many to do the math Oh, how I wish We didn't have to miss My mother's mother While she walks a new path But grandpa's bound to make her laugh I can't imagine how happy they are To have finally traveled so far She was a poet and a dancer He raced cars and died of cancer But I feel assured their dreams were the same Just like they hated losing a game There's nothing but beginners luck Around them now And only we have to feel the pain Of not having their healing words around But a sunshine smile on a cloud covered day Let's me know you're okay So I'll empty the ashtray 'Cause I'm one pack closer to you someday.
9.
I want to be warm yellow light Pouring over you during nights You don't seem to feel just quite right Settle down, there's no need to fight The world is only what you make it So take it For what it's worth The earth is nothing but dirt Us, and were Somehow spinning in the Universe Many questions No answers found So I shape a sound And stomp the ground I want to be warm yellow light Pounding down on everything in sight When you complain about the rain You just can't find your inner light Shining, even though you can't see it You gotta be it For you The world is only what you make it So take it For what it's worth.
10.
As I stand under what I do not understand A sunny, spring sky clearly painted by hand I feel as if I'm shown something more Something only I could never choose to ignore Oh my god, I can't believe I can see So I know you can't believe in me But I thank you anyway For casting me in your play And with no lines to say The present past away Running a race Spinning in space I'm lying in place With light on my face My worries erased I can no longer hate Take the food from my plate I don't need it anymore I found a new garden to explore With a weathered wooden gate To a house with no door And I'm suddenly sure This little nothing will be The eternal something for me.
11.
Just a normal morning Not a hint, no warning A phone call from a friend How could this have happened? Just the night before I swear, I could have swore I would see you today But not at all this way White roads sent a truck through A guardrail then into A tree close to a pond I can't believe you're gone On that day we found out Friends piled in my house These walls were once so loud We are all quiet now Thinking no way, no how Could one of us go down So soon and out of sight Did you put up a fight? Out of time, no measure Just bright, sunny weather Wherever you will go Though you sleep in the snow I helped friends carry you To the hearse and then to That, dear god, awful tent Where your wife and parents Sit and share tears with us As we do what we must Fare thee well, dear friend I hope we meet again Are you here, near, or far? Is it gorgeous where you are? Do we become dust or a star? I stare off into the skies My friend, I need no replies I just need light in your eyes. Big Ear Willie's Silly Sea(Sing Along Song) All these notes Sailing in boats Off to a land We can't understand Oh, now I see the seashore Oh, how I need to see more The wind has carried Off those we buried To a deeper abyss But you know we still miss Our friend across the sea But someday the light will set us free So let's sing along to a silly sea song We're not far from where we belong Hey hey, ho ho We sing as we row So slow Towards the light Life is a gift Hold it tight.
12.
I want to be warm yellow light Pouring over you during nights You don't seem to feel just quite right Settle down, there's no need to fight The world is only what you make it So take it For what it's worth The earth is nothing but dirt Us, and were Somehow spinning in the Universe Many questions No answers found So I shape a sound And stomp the ground I want to be warm yellow light Pounding down on everything in sight When you complain about the rain You just can't find your inner light Shining, even though you can't see it You gotta be it For you The world is only what you make it So take it For what it's worth.

credits

released December 3, 2013

Written, performed, recorded, and produced by Joseph Crabtree

Credits for "Can I Be Your Light?" go to:
Katie Dixon - Vocals
Jay Godeaux - Double bass
Alex Milliken - Whistle

Album art by Katie Dixon

© (W)e(A)re(R)ecords 2013

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Joseph and His Ghost Ohio

A neverending search for the beauty in chaos.

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